A Little Too Generous

Imagine receiving a US$500 tip from a Lebanese businessman for a work well-done. Now imagine instead of giving you five 100-dollar bills, he gives you a single 500-dollar bill:

When a Malaysian hotel cleaner was tipped $500 by a high-rolling, self-proclaimed Lebanese “billionaire”, it seemed to good to be true.
[...]
Businessman Elie Youseef Najem’s generosity turned out to be his undoing. When police tipped off by the disappointed cleaner searched his hotel room they discovered $66 million in counterfeit bills. Among them were 60 $1 million bills and bundles of other $100,000 and $500 notes stashed in a black bag in his Kuala Lumpur room.

That’s alot of Monopoly money! The cleaner should have no immediately that the money was fake. I mean, we are on record of being the most stingiest people in the Middle East.

AP: Police found 60 $1 million bills and bundles of other $100,000 and $500 notes stashed in a black bag

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Dearborn is Beirut

This time I’ll be handing myself a "Looks Like Beirut" Certificate:

Sabastian Restum, 40, appeared in U.S. District Court in Detroit today charged with witness tampering. U.S. Magistrate Judge Mona Majzoub ordered Restum jailed until a detention hearing scheduled for Wednesday.

Details about a "hit" Restum allegedly put out on Wayne County Assistant Prosecutor Abed Hammoud are contained in an FBI affidavit that backs up the witness tampering complaint.

I know Dearborn was the Arab capital of the US but I had no idea how integrated they were into society; you’ve got a judge, a prosecutor and the alleged criminal. And not only that, the article also has the Lebanese village spirit intertwined:

"The ‘hit’ was to be executed when Hammoud next traveled to Lebanon, where he was born and where some of his family resides," the affidavit says. Restum told the man that he and Hammoud were from the same village in Lebanon, and "Hammoud would be killed even if he had only a day left to live."

You’re never far away from home, I guess.

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“It was like Beirut”

Here’s my second “Looks Like Beirut Award” in as many days. Mr. Andy Ward, I give you the floor:

“I was up at about 1.50am to 2pm and I smelt it. I looked out the window and saw the reflection in the shop window opposite. I thought it was the room below that was on fire.

“I did the alarm and called the fire brigade. We came down at the back of the building thinking we could get out through the archway, but the cars were on fire, so we had to go through the pub.

“Tyres were going off, it was a bit like Beirut.”

I’m sorry Andy but that’s nothing like Beirut. We make sure to remove the tyres off the cars before we set them on fire.

A Lebanese protestor carries tires to feed the fire during a demonstration for wage increases in Beirut on May 7, 2008.

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Gold Hunt

Grab your metal detectors, there’s gold in Lebanon:

The mortgage broker who posted an online confession last month before fleeing the country on a private jet has been returned to Sacramento to face a 44-count federal indictment.

…

He left the U.S. the previous week on a chartered jet to Lebanon where authorities believe he may have stashed up to $5 million in gold.

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When in Lebanon…

Bribe. But don’t do it in a country where corruption is prosecuted:

An Emirati policeman has been sentenced to two years in jail and fined by the Abu Dhabi Criminal Court of First Instance for accepting a bribe and filing false reports of two accidents to help the Lebanese owner of a car rental agency collect insurance payouts.

Not uncommon to find Lebanese who think they are above everyone else, including the law. A perfect example of this are the ‘No Smoking’ signs at Beirut International Airport. You may fail to see them them thanks to the group of passengers standing in your way and smoking.

Of course, the Lebanese man was sentenced for his crimes:

The court also ordered the Lebanese man, the second accused, to two years in prison to be followed by deportation for bribing the policeman and claiming insurance money using the false reports.

A lesson to all: bribing only works in Lebanon.

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